Comments on: How to Find Fellow Introverts In College

By: unclegluon

unclegluon — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 14:57:52 +0000

Be deaf to the banal attention getting noise
Be blind to distractions and flashing lights.

Because you have lived under the surface,
You already know the subtle signs to watch for.

Upon discovery, a carefully hidden hint captures our attention more than a proliferation of gigantic glowing signs ever could. Even more, it captures our imagination!

The most common desires are tiresome and most often regarded with contempt and mockery. Same old story.

Most valuable is gold that glitters for your eyes only.

By: Wonderdog

Wonderdog — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 13:54:30 +0000

I can relate well to all these comments, as I am a persistent and unrepentant introvert. I am happy with that, what I am not happy with is my lack of social contact, and especially with people who I identify with as fellow introverts.

My ongoing problem is this – if those people who I would relate to best are intrinsically anti-social (as I am), then how does one find them? Much of the criteria you specify for the identification of the introvert requires that they are hidden from public view, and therefore are not there to be identified.

How can I find people who are usually hidden behind closed blinds? This is one of the ongoing pains of my existence.

By: unclegluon

unclegluon — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 05:06:53 +0000

An introvert is unlikely to rise very high in an organization.
It requires not primarily skill at one’s job but social politicking to move up the corporate ladder. Without aggressive self promotion, your co-workers can actually forget you exist.
Furthermore, advancement requires putting in crazy hours which an introvert who values personal time is not willing to do. It’s called working to live.

If an introvert can find a secure position between the bottom and middle they can potentially be in a job slot they’re overqualified for and get consistently good performance reviews.

An introvert in this position is not anyone’s buddy, but also is not perceived as a threat to anyone’s power or aspirations of advancement. Such a person is usually treated in a friendly fashion but never as a true member of the group.

Sometimes being the quiet cripple pays off. Consider the case of Claudius. In Robert Graves’ fictional account, Clau-Clau(nickname derived from his speech impediment) becomes emperor of Rome because no one in his cutthroat family considered him worth poisoning or assassinating!

If you are an introvert, watch for these battlefield promotions. One of your few advantages is that you’ll be among the last people standing when things get really ugly.

Those few introverts who can make it into the higher levels of an organization are often destined to be at the top. They reach a critical point where performance is king and politicking without results gets you nowhere. Years of advancement against the odds finally culminates in respectability.

By: JW

JW — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 00:23:09 +0000

I have a question for you, unclegluon. What are your thoughts on introversion in the workplace, in terms of how introverts are treated?

By: unclegluon

unclegluon — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 21:14:56 +0000

I was astounded how so many people at college were already acting like best buddies on the very first day!
I was very fortunate to have a foreigner as my freshman roommate. He was fascinating to talk to, soft spoken, and respectful.

In college, a ‘model student’ is the person who can cram in as many activities and social distinctions as possible while still getting good grades.

The logic is that the person who can juggle the most bowling pins is the best student!
So far as I was able to tell, student senate(an impotent farce) and sports were entirely irrelevant to receiving an education.

Nowhere does the college community seem to take into account that critical thought and reflection are often solitary, personal activities. Merely keeping oneself as busy as possible is seen as the ultimate accomplishment!

There seems to be no recognition, that for many introverts time outside of class and studying for class is an opportunity to apply and test the knowledge that has been acquired.

By: JW

JW — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 02:53:19 +0000

I knew that it wasn’t going to be a great experience the minute I stepped into my freshman dormroom for the first time, and my roommate and I barely spoke to each other on that first day and any day after that. I went to a small, private college, so it was easy to observe, during that first week of feshman year, that all of the outgoing students formed a lot of friendships quickly. I didn’t go to parties, I stayed in my dorm room a lot, and I mostly did keep the blinds closed. Having the blinds open was like an invasion of my privacy. It didn’t help that I was slightly agoraphobic, in addition to being introverted. I did meet a few students who were friendly and whom I felt comfortable socializing with, but for the most part, I kept to myself. I didn’t like very many of the students anyway, so I did mostly solitary activities, like going to the local coffee shop to study and read, or going to a movie with one of few friends that I did have.

By: unclegluon

unclegluon — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 23:40:08 +0000

I am definitely a believer in starting from scratch. Collective checkmate and redundancy cushioning make it impossible for a minority to bring any real change. A society that tries to include everyone includes no one. Existing in a mass industrial society fails to satisfy our basic tribal instinct.

By: Eric

Eric — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 20:45:45 +0000

Being an outsider in multiple ways (multiracial, +3 SD IQ, INTJ, interests, personality/world outlook), I’ve found that the best solution is to build up a group of like-minded people from scratch.